Facebook Comment War
This was so damn funny, i HAD to post.
So a friend of mine had a status update, to which I had to add some wise ass comments… which of course, turned into a war. For anonymity sake, I’ll refer to the person I’m arguing with as… hmm… shall we say “Toki”, which means rabbit in korean.
Status Update: Some people are just 3D losers…. no matter which way you look at them!!
Toki: “Some people” = 99.69% of the males out there. Hehe. You go girl!
Me: Do i need 3d glasses to find these losers? Toki - I know i haven’t met you so it’s probably not in my place to say this, but can you say that with certainty? Have you met 99.69% of the males in this world to qualify your statement?
Another commenter: TaeWoo: No, just a mirror… ZING! Toki: I love your name. It is a japanese for “Time of Opportunity”. Also is the name of an old samurai clan. And many other Japanese historical references.
Toki: TaeWoo - Population in the US alone is 308 million people so even as beautiful, intelligent, educated, and articulate as Caren & I both are, it is just virtually impossible for us to have met 99.69% of the males in this world. However, we have come to our conclusion with absolute confidence and certainty because as graduates with a psych degree from Berkeley and Columbia, we are fully capable of applying the appropriate research methods to back up our 99.69% statement about the “3-D Loser” theory. How do we do so? By simply looking at all of the males that have crossed our path within our lifetime, be it a guy we went out with for a month, our friend’s bf, our neighbor, classmate, coworker, or a guy that keeps on bugging us although we’ve already dropped him a million hints that we aren’t interested. So after some serious calculation and tedious statistics work, we were able to confirm that out of about 2,000 guys we do know: only 7 of them are nice and normal. Thus they fall into the 0.31% while the rest (1993) were all losers in one aspect or another. As a matter of fact, in any research that had ever been conducted, it was never a prerequisite to be able to test or survey ALL of the world’s population because such method is rather expensive, a waste of time and impossible. As long as a researcher has enough of a large sample and is able to ensure representative sampling, the study and findings would be considered VALID. But then again, if you ever went to college at all, you should already know this?
Me: I didn’t mean my reply to be an offensive one, but since the blood has been spilled…
“as graduates with a psych degree from Berkeley and Columbia, we are fully capable of applying the appropriate research methods to back up our 99.69% statement about the “3-D Loser” theory.”So apparently, you need an ivy league degree to be a good judge of character. Everyone one else is just bunch of turds….
“But then again, if you ever went to college at all, you should already know this?”
And yes, I went to college. I have a ph.D. from world renowned Devry University. Class of March.
I, unlike some people, tend to believe in greater humanity. That people are inherently good and once given the chance, they will do wonders to fulfill their dreams, goals, and purpose. Most won’t, but given the right conditions, they will. I believe people are by nature good, but at times choose and do bad. I believe no one can be categorized into certain “buckets” b/c quite frankly, you cannot possibly know these people well enough to make such classification. That would be like me saying ivy league graduates are nothing but pretentious upper-class wanna-be’s.
Toki, notice… The update says “some” people are losers. You said “most” people are losers. A WORLD of difference there.
PS: Toki in korean means rabbit… like those animals that breed just because they exist. No planning, no thought involved. They just breed. Tokis just breed. Just because.
I was actually kinda disappointed because it stopped. Toki must’ve ran away or something. But nope, I was wrong. Toki private messages me this dooshbag comment:
Toki: You have a good point there because as a “pretentious, upper-class wanna-be” Ivy League graduate, I am only familiar with top notch institutions such as Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Dartmouth, etc… and maybe UCLA or USC but never have I once heard of the name Devry. But since you’ve mentioned attaining your education from there, I did some googling to find out that Devry is some online college. So in other words, it is pretty much the caliber of Phoenix University and or to put it any fancy term: Devry is just the college version of the GED high school program, which is ideal for those that are lazy, inadequate, handicap, and or pregnant. Perhaps this would explain why such students have no concepts about applied research methods and therefore are unable to comprehend our “3-D loser” 99.69% reference. Although there’s some difference between the word “some” that Caren used and the word “most” that I’d claimed, in the end, if someone is a loser, they are a loser. Period. Caren was too nice to use the word “most” because she didn’t want to offend those that are on her friend list that may see her wall. But it doesn’t matter if 99.69% or 69.99% of the men out there are losers, if one isn’t a loser they wouldn’t need to get so defensive.
And since you’ve claimed to have gotten a phD from Devry, I just don’t understand why you aren’t trying to take on a job as a professor, perhaps at a community college, to teach morals and ethics (since you have such strong beliefs about the innate good) or you could also teach Korean as a foreign language to those that are actually interested. Because to be honest with you, my name “TOKI” is Japanese and I could careless what the hell it means in Korean as I have absolutely zero curiosity with the culture. I have never once watched an episode of Korean drama, eaten Kimchi, or even thought of dating a Korean guy, But nevertheless, thank you for letting me know that TOKI means rabbit in your language. I think bunnies are cute, and there’s nothing wrong with them just breeding and breeding. For god’s sake, the main goal of every creature that exist on this planet, including humans, is to reproduce, and reproduce as much as possible. It’s simply part of evolution. And if Caren & I weren’t so busy pursuing our career and a higher education, we would be breeding all day long just like those bunnies. That would actually be very ideal for society since we would be passing on our superior genes, which include the heritable traits such as beauty, intelligence, class, and poise. But on the other hand, if those insecure, bitter 3-D Losers were to breed, they would be end up producing very poor offspring, and definitely not with Caren’s or my eggs!
Me: “Korean as I have absolutely zero curiosity with the culture”
Ok. Good for you.
“I have never once watched an episode of Korean drama, eaten Kimchi, or even thought of dating a Korean guy”
- korean drama : Oh you should watch me and my mom. We’re drama family
- kimchi: oh you should try it. It helps with fertility, especially for rabbits.
- dating korean guy: Me neither. I’m straight.“But nevertheless, thank you for letting me know that TOKI means rabbit in your language.”
You’re welcome. If you want some kimchi, send me your address and i’ll ship you some. I think rabbits like cabbage. You might like it.
“never have I once heard of the name Devry”
What? For real? You must live in a box. Oh wait, you’re a rabbit. You live in a hole.
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